i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
