Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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