I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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