plz talk dirty to me
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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