Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
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