for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize