ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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