Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize