go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
