and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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