I want to walk on stilts...naked
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
