now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
