so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
