I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize