I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
You're like the curious george of whores
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
