No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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