it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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