Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
