I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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