Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
