i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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