if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
