He is an equal opportunity slut.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
