I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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