to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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