so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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