I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
