..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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