I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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