I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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