Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
he thought i was a dude.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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