is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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