Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
