FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
