we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
