what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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