The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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