i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
