Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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