I cockslap morals
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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