So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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