My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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