That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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