All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize
