I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize