If i come over, it means nothing
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize