Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
The Olympian is in my bed
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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