After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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