Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Your dad touched me again.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
