i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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